20 Reasons NOT to Work in Large Companies




Large corporations only one type of professionals - professionals working in large corporations.

The text below is made on the basis of the views of several people who worked for a long time in the office, and exchanged the comfort of open-space and free coffee in the business and a balanced life. More after the break...

You never get a satisfying career you

It is worth considering how many layers of bosses is over you to understand that you take too much effort to overcome the internal resistance of the company. Playing - get out, work - hardly.

The initiative is punishable

To push the simplest change, which seems nonsense - for example, changing the letters in the layout or correction of the creative process - you have to spend enormous power. Most of all, when you win in your business, you will not get any satisfaction.

You will not be able to express their views publicly

If you are an expert in online advertising, or just know who is who in the market, and you have a big corporation, you are there at the time of shut up. You can not say that your product is bad - unethical in relation to his colleagues that the product is a poor competitor - is unethical in relation to competitors, generally can not comment on anything - it is better to keep silent, and then just offend someone. All colleagues are very valuable.

Team! Team! Team!

Team spirit and synergy, in unison, one and all, but together we can ... This you have heard plenty of very many. In the command responsibility you learn to hide their incompetence or inexperience. The most miserable project will grow into a working group with the group the same liability for which the offender could not be found, and rewards those who get anyhow.

You lose your emotions

The offices are not made to envy and enjoy. That is, all that is within you will gradually died down, but you will no longer show it all on his face. Boredom - this is your new mask.

You will learn to truly rejoice in the victories, which do not have any relation

You'll say "Well done guys designers! To give, "" Cool WE project. " You know that you are not in the business, but you're welcome. Your projects will run less and less, and enjoy something you need. Let the stone face of an office worker.

You have forgotten how to talk back and get used to the pace of working, which is adopted in the company

A month ago, you were annoyed that the treaty agree on a month, and offer some trains per week. You'll be in the same stop and sincerely understand the real course of things.

You will learn not to listen to people who say to you

Most experienced office staff as soon as they begin to talk, bristling with a smartphone or laptop. You will learn how to constantly check the mail and believe that you are very busy and you are VERY much depends.

You will learn to spend most of their time in useless talks

"- Let's go to peregovorku! - Who to take? - Yes, take it all! "Yes, you will collect a mini-audience extras, which will check your mail while you're talking about anything as long as the next portion of the skilled office workers do not throw you to do the same.

You will have no problems with delays

You'll be late everywhere - on internal meetings at the checkpoint where the waiting partners or contractors, on-site meeting. And you will have no problem with it - forgot met a colleague in the corridor, traffic jams - you believe that all this is the normal reason for delay.

You will become a caffeine-addicted and love the toilets

Coffee morning coffee before poludnikom coffee before lunch, afternoon coffee, coffee and 5 o'clock tea, coffee before going home. If you smoke, then add as many times as coffee, how many times you smoke. Toilets save when drinking coffee just did not want to. If there is a smoking room, it means there will be a headquarters, peregovorka, meeting room.

You will spend 12-14 hours on the job

But you are working or not going at all, or squeeze out a 2-3 hours of power. You will learn how to convince yourself that you are doing the right job that you are overwhelmed by all this notice. While secretly know everything that surrounded idlers and therefore behave the same way. The main thing is not to cause suspicion that you have something else in his life and work - just a means to achieve.

Increase in wages

Work you less productive. You, as the moss will acquire unnecessary tasks and meetings, but you will always feel that you deserve better and improve patches - for you it is taken for granted the event.

Do you diagnose symptoms of office workers

You will begin to increasingly ill colds. You quickly explain what it's all air conditioned and do not need to worry - do not disappear as insurance. You'll get sick a lot and enjoy it.

You will be overweight and ugly body

Again, there will be ready to explain - stress, a sedentary lifestyle. But that's because your body and brain will not do the work requires a lot of calories, you'll be a coffee-points haul napakovannye pechenyushkoy sugar, which will be 10 times a day, drink coffee with sugar. At lunch you will eat tasteless lunches that are prepared from the balance at the kitchen yesterday. This food is cooked without love, but because it is not useful.

You'll adore Friday

For the private entrepreneur Friday - it's terrible, the business ceases to operate for 2 days. For the office of a professional - this is the best day of the week - beer, singing and dancing are only possible on this day.

Yet you'll love corporate parties

Subject is not important. You absorb alcohol and food for a pittance, but it will be able to believe what you've done something special. You get used to the shame, and over the years, the Corporation and will know more about fellow filth than their spouses. And you will like it. About the same can be gossip.

You will lose the spirit of startapersky

All these weird people that make the products are not as important as you will cause contempt. And you'll always know that in a startup you will succeed the first time, just you do not need. You are different, different, successful ... already.

You gain credits

At the beginning of the work you want auto, like his colleagues. You buy it on credit, being piously convinced that "Well, an apartment for 30 years, I do not take it." A few years later the system the appearance of money on a plastic card your sense of self-blunted, and you will fit into such debts, which seemed impossible to you yesterday.

50 Reasons I Love New Jersey




01. Because we have the most diners in the world, you can always get something to soak up the booze at 3:00 AM.

02. The Jersey accent makes you sound tough, even if you aren’t.

03. You’re usually only three persons removed from knowing a Mafia guy. More after the break...



04. We have the beautiful Jersey Shore. (And the bad tipping Québécois that go with it.)

05. We have Princeton. Not too shabby. Einstein didn’t seem to mind living in Jersey either.

06. The light bulb, the phonograph and motion pictures were invented here. I’m pretty sure the first porn flick was made here too.

07. Jersey Babes.  If you need to ask why, you’ll never understand.

08. Our governor doesn’t give a shit what you think of him. He doesn’t even give a shit what we think of him!

09. We’ve take wearing leather to an art form. Black leather blazer with green leather pants? Rock on.

10. I enjoy feeling like a shark when I see Zip cars with New York tags on the Turnpike. Blood in the water!

11. Cheese fries. Cheese fries with gravy.

12. I love always being ten minutes from a mall – until it’s Christmas.

13. Gasoline pumped by friendly attendants. How civilized. Only Oregon has a similar sense of class.

14. I can give snobby New Yorkers faulty directions and send them into Newark.

15. Jersey’s a movable olfactory feast.

16. We have the highest property taxes and auto insurance rates. We’re number one! We’re number one!

17. The Statue of Liberty is ours; we just don’t want to make the support payments.

18. We have two New York pro football teams.

19. It’s easy to get Newark Airport. JFK? Fuggedaboutit.

20. Our State Troopers wear scary uniforms modeled after the German Army! Not that Smokey the Bear shit.

21. We all know where Jimmy Hoffa’s buried. We just ain’t telling.

22. We have the second largest waterfall on the East Coast  – in Paterson of all places.

23. One of the first commercial television networks (DuMont) began broadcasting out of Passaic. So, in a weird way, Snooki and the Situation is our fault.

24. We have to love Bruce Springsteen under penalty of death.

25. We have the most guys named Tony. We have the most girls named Tina.

26. We were invaded by Mars.

27. We took down a Nazi dirigible. Yes, that was us.

28. We have the biggest state Napoleon complex in America. Probably because his brother lived here.

29. We had the Lindbergh baby thing long before OJ Simpson was born.

30. George Washington slept just about everywhere here. Guy got around.

31. Samuel Colt made the first revolver here. You feeling lucky, punk?

32. The modern submarine was developed here. And I don’t mean that sandwich deluded out-of-staters insist on calling  a hoagie, grinder or a hero.

33. New Jersey was corrupt before Chicago was a name on a map.

34. The Army tests secret weapons here. Probably because of that Martian thing.

35. A shitload of Nobel Prizes were earned in Jersey. (Princeton has 35 alone) See! We’re smart.

36. We have more municipalities than California and are way cooler.

37. If Manhattanites are suddenly faced with a zombie outbreak, we have plans to blow up those bridges and tunnels they love to make fun of.

38. Batman lives in New Jersey.

39. We are the country’s third largest cranberry producer. Dead mafia guys make great fertilizer.

40. We used to have the Miss America pageant until some jerk took it from us. When we find that guy Tony Soprano will fuck him up real good.

41. We have more vintage IROC-Z cars than any state in America. (You have to be from Bloomfield to get that reference)

42. Frank Sinatra was from Hoboken. He hated the place, sure, but he’s still ours.

43. Watching tourists trying to drive though one of our traffic circles. We should sell tickets.

44. Our sweet corn is the shit.

45. A significant percentage of our male population gets their eyebrows threaded.

46. Sacred Heart Cathedral in Newark is bigger than St. Patrick’s. So there!

47. The first dinosaur bones were found here – next to the bodies of Tony “Cannoli” Zamboni and Frank “The Fink” Careltti.

48. If you want to get rid of your car, leave it in Newark for five minutes.

49. Jersey is musically stuck in the Eighties. Bon Jovi! Bon Jovi!

50. Valium was invented in NJ. You’ll need it on the Turnpike.

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